Happy Candy Day!

One of my favorite days of the year, for many reasons. Costumes. Candy. Ghosts. What's not to like?

Whatever your take on and participation in this holiday, I hope everyone has a fun and safe day. I thought to celebrate it we could do something a little different. A while back, there were some posts being flung around where people wrote six word stories, trying to be as succinct as possible. I want to resurrect this challenge (in zombie form, perhaps). You all have six words in which to tell a story, but it must be either a ghost story, or some scary, spooky or otherwise Halloweenish tale.

Here's a first attempt:

Haunted house. Stupid kids. Nuff said.

All right, so it's not too scary, but hopefully it can kick-start your imaginations.

I see that skull's grin.

Advice (from someone else) for first-time novelists

I enjoy when someone provides a realistic perspective on writing and doesn't sugar-coat what our expectations should be as writers trying to get published. Kate Elliott has a few things to say to those of us who have yet to break through that first barrier of getting a book published.

http://www.deepgenre.com/wordpress/kateelliott/business-of-writing/advice-for-first-time-sff-novelists#more-450

The biggest piece of advice she gives isn't so much advice as observation:

I am sure we can find the exception that proves the rule, but every writer I know who has been successful…has worked immensely hard, turned or churned out a lot of pages in the journey through apprenticeship toward some level of mastery, and kept writing despite setbacks, rejection, cold feet, and those soul-sucking periods of doubt.

I've come across a certain quote in various forms, whether at conferences, online forums, agent panels, or wherever. It isn't meant to discourage in a mean and nasty way, nor is it someone's attempt to lessen competition on the field. It's the saying that "If you can quit writing, do so." In other words, if you are writing just for the kicks, the fame, the money, or whatever, then it's not going to be worth it, because real writing requires a lot of sweat spilled on the page. However, if you are willing to put in that effort, stick your butt in the chair and stubbornly keep trying to better your writing, revise and work those ideas through to the end, then nothing, not even failure, will keep you from being a writer.

Check out the rest of her article for some other great pointers, including thoughts on various types of writing careers available to you, and short, medium, and long-term strategies on getting your stories written. Take writing seriously, but at the same time, don't forget to enjoy the whole process, because it can be a lot of fun, alongside the struggle. At least, I know I've found both along the way.


I see that smile.

Publishing trends survey

A hat tip to Jonathan Lyons of the Lyons Literary Agency for pointing out this somewhat amusing, yet sobering industry survey.

http://www.publishingtrends.com/Survey.html

Some intriguing facts come to light here, most of which could be told to you by anyone who works within this illustrious industry. The majority of the workforce is split up into the editorial departments and literary agencies, which is understandable considering those are the two areas that work the closest with the authors and manuscripts.

64.8% of all publishing employees live in NYC. I am somewhere in the decimal point, if you squint enough.

Publishing also proves to be one of the most social industries around, one of the most unpredictable, and, of course, the worst compensated as far as pay goes. I'm glad that the survey does note that the unexpected successes and breakthroughs can make all the toil and trouble worth it. Seeing a tiny book suddenly blast into bestsellerdom despite all expectations can send people waltzing through the offices. Plus there's working with other literary-minded folks, the creative atmosphere and, as it says 63% of respondents listed, the intellectual challenge. (and free books! hooyah!)

Ahem. Anyways, I thought this might prove interesting, even for anyone already hiding out in the cubicle maze and shuffling lots and lots of manuscript papers. Sometimes it's good to see how other people really feel about their jobs.

How do you feel about yours?


I see that smile.

Lucid Dreaming Mask

As one of my recent stories dealt with dreams, I did a lot of digging into various aspects of technology and meds that help people sleep. This is somewhat along those lines, just a bit...different.

Lucid dreams are an interesting phenomenon. I think most people have had one at some time or another. It's where you are aware of the fact that you are dreaming, and so gain a level of control of the dream that you normally don't have. So, if you were being chased by some sort of tree monster through the halls of your old high school, now you can choose to turn around, make a flamethrower pop into your hands, and toast the critter. That kind of thing. Or maybe you are having a flying dream, and you can then choose to swoop over the world, visiting various sights and people.

There is a trend these days to try and teach one's self how to lucid dream at will; how to make every night an opportunity to wake up within the dream and explore one's inner psyche. I've never been able to do it, possibly because I'm such a deep sleeper, and I don't like the idea of interrupting my own rest just to traipse about my nighttime hallucinations.

But if anyone is interested in becoming a lucid dreamer, I found this device which is supposed to help.

http://cre.ations.net/creation/face-mounted-lucid-dreaming-mask

This device, at pre-programmed intervals that are supposed to coincide with various phases of sleep, flashes those little lights through your eyelids, signalling to you that you are dreaming. You are supposed to be able to be aware of the flashing lights without truly waking up, and so remain with whatever dream you are having and take control of it. Consider this a dream alarm clock.

Does it work? No clue. I haven't bought one yet. But if anyone has experience with lucid dreams, I'd be interested to hear about it. If you want to get one of these devices as well and let us know how it works, we'll be in awe of your adventurous nature.

I know. It's hardly a fashion statement, but come on, this is for science!

I see that smile.

Weird News Weekend

We haven't had one of this for a while, so it's time to reveal a few headlines that made me sit back and ponder.

First off, I loved the succinctness of this one: Little Fish Eats Big Fish. Explodes. Dies.

This next one connects somewhat to the article I posted about various odd canned foods. It makes a horrible sort of sense though, when you think about it:

The Future of Space Food: Bugs

And this last one covers five historic episodes of alcohol abuse. Why would this article be of any Weird News interest? Check out item #4:

Drinking stories that put yours to shame

That's it for today, folks. I hope you all are getting your costume fixes in with some parties this weekend, and piling up on the sugar and guilt with as much candy as your bloodstream can handle.


I see that smile.

A review of Peter Watt's Blindsight

I read the PDF version of this, which you can access here, should you be so inclined.

Here are my thoughts. The book is definitely worth reading. It brims with tension, both of the psychological type, as well as imminent violence and other space-faring action. This is not a pink-fuzzy, feel-good story. Some spots are rather bleak and provide a dark vision of the future, but it is overall a compelling tale. None of the characters are entirely in the "good" or "bad" camp. Some you'll like more than others (or maybe "sympathize" is a better term) while others you'll be morbidly fascinated with, and will read to the end just to see how they fall apart.

Here's the basic plot: The earth has been hit by a sudden shower of alien artifacts that burn up in the atmosphere and broadcast some sort of message to an object outside our solar system. A specially gathered and trained team is sent on a mission to intercept this object and figure out what it's doing and whether it's hostile to humanity.

The characters are a strange bunch, and their many unique qualities, backgrounds and perspectives on life provided much of the conflict that kept me reading.

You've got a "zombie" observer, who had half his brain surgically removed so he is better able to tap into his mathematical and pattern-matching abilities. However, this leaves him unable to comprehend the motives, emotions and actions of everyone else, and so he more or less "fakes" it through life, building algorithms to determine what he should do and say in response to the world around him. He actually provides most of the point of view for the story, and so we are inside his head as he tries to figure out why people are doing what they do. It is a difficult perspective to write, and I think Watts succeeds somewhat, but there are times where the "zombieness" slips away and I had the feeling this was just a maladjusted guy who needed a some group therapy. Anyways...

You have a genetically engineered vampire who captains the ship, and may not be fully in control of his primeval hunger. His prey/predator philosophy provides a constant undercurrent to the chapters.

You have a linguistics expert who has self-induced multiple personalities, who is also romantically involved with the cyborg who runs many of the ships functions. And lastly, a military officer responsible for all their safety during the mission, but who feels entirely irrelevant.

They are quite the dysfunctional family, and their interactions are full of dark humor and the struggle to understand each other as they fight to survive and comprehend the mystery they are forced to confront in the alien artifact.

Watts has a keen eye for squeamish detail, and even though this adventure takes place in a sterile spaceship, far in the void of space, it retains an organic feel to it that reminds you this is a story about humanity, however it has been altered throughout the centuries, and whatever its fate through the years to come.

This story is a reflection and pondering on the nature of consciousness, and asks whether intelligence automatically assumes sentience of an organism. I.e., can something be smarter than us, but not have any true awareness of its own existence? And is our self-awareness actually an advantage as we go out and explore our universe? I found the ideas put forward in the book to be fascinating, and the way the larger issues end up affecting each character in their smaller schemes was brilliant, including some of the slight character and plot twists towards the end. It is thought-provoking, even if you don't end up agreeing with some of the core ideas and concepts it puts forward.

Does his offering this as a free online text make me want to go out and buy the book? Not really. If I somehow acquired it for free, I'd keep it on my bookshelf, but I tend not to purchase stories I've already read. However, I am anxious to see what his next novel will be, and there is a high possibility that I will buy that one. So if his goal was less making a sale on Blindsight and more gaining a fan of his writing who will follow his future works, then his effort has succeeded. And if you aren't one to do much reading on a computer screen, then I would entirely recommend buying this book of Amazon or wherever you prefer.

Anyone else have a chance to read this? I'm always interested in your thoughts and opinions.


I see that smile.

I missed it...

I just realized the 22nd of October was the official one-year anniversary of this blog. I knew it was coming up, but then skipped over it entirely. How's that for perceptive?

I started this blog around the same time I got my first agent. I had the hopes that this meant I would sell that particular manuscript and wanted to have something of an online presence in the event of getting published. Around the same time, several of my short stories had sold, so that gave me something to work on as well. Then about 9 months went by, with various editor rejections of the manuscript, and eventually, in late spring, my agent (who was helpful, professional and encouraging to the end) left the agency for personal reasons and I started over on the publishing hunt. But the blog and website continue, and have proven a lot of fun. Plus it has been great to interact with everyone, share in the adventure and keep each other smiling, wherever we are in our writing endeavors.

I feel like I should do something to celebrate. Unfortunately, I don't yet have a book to give away or anything, so how about we revel in some writing humor instead? Some jokes were shared in yesterday's comments, and I decided to look up other writing and publishing-related jokes and found some of the following:

A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is standing outside.
“What happened, honey?” the man asks.
“Oh, John, it was terrible,” she weeps. “I was cooking, the phone rang. It was your agent. Because I was on the phone, I didn’t notice the stove was on fire. It went up in second. Everything is gone. I nearly didn’t make it out of the house. Poor Fluffy is--”
“Wait, wait. Back up a minute,” The man says. “My agent called?”

And here we have some twists on a classic:

How many science fiction writers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, but it's actually the same person doing it. He went back in time and met himself in the doorway and then the first one sat on the other one's shoulder so that they were able to reach it. Then a major time paradox occurred and the entire room, light bulb, changer and all was blown out of existence. They co-existed in a parallel universe, though.

How many publishers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in. Two to hold down the author.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in, and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.

How many screenwriters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Why does it *have* to be changed?

How many cover blurb writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A VAST AND TEEMING HORDE STRETCHING FROM SEA TO SHINING SEA!!!!

And lastly:

Q. If you were lost in the woods, who would you trust for directions: the publisher who prints everything you write, an agent, or Santa Claus?
A. The agent. The other two indicate you are hallucinating.


Help celebrate the belated anniversary by adding any variety of jokes, writing-related or not, in the comments. Hopefully in another year, we'll still be around, celebrating our various publishing breakthroughs.


I see that smile.

Patience isn't just a virtue

It's a necessity, on all sides of the publishing spectrum.

This insight into an agent's work load shows why they sometimes take those 1-3 months to respond to queries, much less partials and complete manuscript submissions.

http://litsoup.blogspot.com/2007/10/query-update.html

Jenny Rappaport gives us an inside view of how her work space is stacked up with materials to review and why anyone who submits to her shouldn't expect a phase-by-phase update on where she is in considering their submissions. It's not that she doesn't want to keep people informed, but if she took the time to do so, she'd have none left to actually get any reading done.

One "rule" I've come across is that if you've submitted something to an agent, and they haven't got back to you in the time period they ascribed themselves, give them at last half the time extra, if not twice that, before you come calling, asking where your story is. There's nothing wrong with sending a follow-up email to make sure they got the materials in the first place, but try not to hound them, realizing that any time they spend reassuring you that, yes, they really will read your stuff, is more time that they don't have to do so. And always make sure to maintain that professional approach, since I think "whining and complaining about the unfairness of life" sits high on an agent's list of reasons for automatic rejection. Just a hunch.


I see that smile.

Curious canned goods

Working in the city means I've got quite a few food options, from concourse shops to street vendors, or bringing my own bag lunch. But even in the heart of NYC I'd have to search pretty hard to find anything like these offered selections:

http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/multimedia/2007/10/gallery_canned_foods

Well, maybe some sushi joints would have some similar options, but still...

Since places are gearing up already for the Christmas cheer (we haven't even hit Halloween yet, people, take down the inflatable Santa Claus already!), I figured this canned good was the most appropriate:

And I love the "home-style goodness" label on this one. Yes. That's just the way mom used to make 'em.

I see that smile.

Read Peter Watts' Blindsight for free!

I'd seen some intriguing reviews for this book, including a starred review in Publishers Weekly. The premise sounded fascinating: an alien artifact is discovered on the edge of our solar system in the latter years of the 21st century. The spaceship Theseus is sent out to intercept this artifact and see what it's all about, and the crew is one of the most hodgepodge muddle of critters and characters you could ever want.

A cybernetic biologist, a genetically engineered vampire (that's right, vampire), a linguist with induced multiple personalities, a mathematical savant who can't comprehend emotion and intent, and a whole bunch of other strange figures. Together, they have to figure out what this artifact is and what it can do.

A lot of writers have beaten the science fiction trope of "first contact" to death, and so one might think it hard to come up with an original way to approach this kind of story, but it seems Watts has done just that. This seems to be a book where the aliens really are alien, and not just humans in funny costumes, and even the representatives of the human race act extremely outside the bounds of what we might consider human in the first place.

That's not the best part though. If you go here: http://www.rifters.com/real/Blindsight.htm, you can read the entire thing for free, by way of the Creative Commons licensing. You can read it online, download it as a PDF file, or a few other options. This is a great chance to read a highly praised story without dropping a dime and see if it lives up to its growing reputation. I'm diving into the first chapter, and I'll be sure to share my thoughts once I'm done. Looking forward to your opinions as well.

I see that smile.

What we did today

The Church of Park Slope Fall Festival, in all its glory.

I see those smiles.

Bullets versus Swords

We've all seen the movies. The mysterious kung fu master goes up against a gang of thieves and bullies, and after thrashing them to tiny bits with his shiny katana, gets a gun pulled on him by their cowardly leader. Only when the trigger is pulled, the sword master deflects the bullet away. Or maybe he spins the sword so fast it shields him from a spray of bullets.

Despite the obvious impossible reaction time needed for this feat, is it even physically possible for a sword to stand up to a gun? Can a carbon steel, or Damascus steel, acid-etched sword stand up to, say, the merciless pounding from a machine gun?

This video doesn't have any English, either in the voiceover or subtitles, but you can get the gist of it as they compare the two forms of weaponry, show a few aspects of forging a sword, and then finally stick a sword on a shooting range and let you watch it...well, you'll see.



Magnum 140mm Vs Japanese Original Sword - video powered by Metacafe

So the next time you have your sword-wielding ninja master stand up against an army, maybe buck the trend and instead of having him defeat them all with his amazing skills, have him get blown away into bloody shreds. That might surprise the reader a bit.


I see that smile.

Broadminded orcs

Do you want to be an orc? Not the pig-nosed, smelly, barbarian type, I mean, though I'm sure someone out there has dreamt of being one of those. I mean these orcs:

http://www.valingstoneways.com/manifesto.html

Here's the MANIFESTO:

There's been a lot of complaining recently from various sectors of the specfic community about how our genre gets no respect. I say, who cares? Not liking specfic is the literary world's problem, not ours. Why should we worry whether they like what we read? Do they bother themselves over what we think of their favorite books? Of course not. What really matters in the end is that you read what you like, not what someone else tells you to like.That's what this site is all about. Like what you read, and don't worry what anyone else thinks about it. If we readers of speculative fiction are going to be labeled outsiders, the orcs of the reading public, we should at least be proud of it. Instead of grumbling, we should wave our orc flags high. We should be proud of our genre, and not care about anyone else's opinion. Not everybody can like everything. Be happy we have a choice. If the rest of the world doesn't appreciate the books we like, that's their loss, not ours. Long live Frodo, and Harry Potter and Muad'Dib and John Carter and Saxifrage Russell. And, if anyone reading this happens to have a soft spot for Elizabeth Bennet or Nathan Zuckerman, be proud of that too. We orcs, at least, can try to be as broadminded as possible.

WE ARE THE ORCS!

Sign up today if you feel your heart beating to the drum of the literary orcs! Then go skulk into your dank cave and read your favorite speculative fiction books to your orcish heart's content. Then go pillage a town and leave a bunch of people's heads on pikes while their little huts burn in the background and the wailing of the survivors sends a tremble of fear across the land...

Ahem. Got a little carried away there.

(looks around)

Orcs!

(scampers off)


I see that smile.

Evil! So much cliched evil!

Evil is dumb. There's no other explanation for why the villains continue to make idiotic mistakes that lets the hero shish-ka-bob their kidneys. There are far too many nearsighted megalomaniacs who spend all their time making complicated deathtraps, gloating over inevitable victory, only to be undone because they can't seem to figure out how to tie their own shoelaces before running into battle. James Bond would be dead a hundred times over if his various captors and enemies had just offed him with a master sniper from half a mile away, or decided to gut him as he lay bound before them, rather than walking off and leaving him strapped to some deadly machine. It's the fine points here. Common sense works, even if you are a villain.

Sure, stupid evil people are funny, but hardly satisfying in a story. In fact, I believe that when a villain is stronger, smarter and more resourceful than the hero that there are a lot more ways to make life suck for the protagonist, which is pretty much the point, right?

Check out this list: Stupid Plot Tricks

It starts out with, If I Ever Become an Evil Overlord (which I think I posted a variation of some time back), and lists 230 stupid things for said Overlord to avoid doing so that his downfall is no longer inevitable. This includes measures such as:

8. If an associate begins to transform into something large and threatening, I will immediately act to neutralize the threat, and not wait until the transformation is complete. Likewise, if an enemy begins to metamorphose into something else, I will immediately start whacking away at it, instead of watching in fascination.

13. Self-appointed prophets who deliver elliptically-worded warnings will be politely asked to rephrase their utterances in plainer terms. If said prophet refuses the request, a five-year-old child will be asked to explain the meaning of the prophecy.

139. If I'm sitting in my camp, hear a twig snap, start to investigate, then encounter a small woodland creature, I will send out some scouts anyway just to be on the safe side. (If they disappear into the foliage, I will not send out another patrol; I will break out the napalm.)

The If I Ever Become an Evil Overlord list is closely followed by tried truisms for the Good Guy, Starfleet Captains, and Auxiliary Characters, such as evil henchmen, sidekicks, and Legions of Doom.

A favorite of mine is from the Sidekick section:

17. If I am flying a one-man craft which is critically damaged, I will eject. Only if the ejector seat fails will I belt out a long, despairing, agonized scream as I fly the craft into an enemy structure.

Read through this not only with an eye for plotting out your scheme of world domination, but also to see what overused bits to avoid saddling your characters and plots with. Also, it can be a fun evening game to go through your video collection and see how many of these you can spot in Hollywood's slurry of drama.


I see that smile.

Any gamers will enjoy this...

If you have any experience with computer games (some roleplayers might like this as well) then check out this music video. It plays at the end of a recently released game, Portals.



Lots of inside jokes about first-person shooters, AI's gone mad, and other game tropes, but even if you don't play that kind of stuff, it could be a fun watch.

I'm still alive, and I'd love some cake right about now.

On the writing side, I technically finished a new rough draft of the manuscript I've been working on for a while. Clocked in at a few thousand over 100k. The ending took me a little while to sign off on, and I'm still not sure if I finished on the right note, but I guess that can come during the revisions. I'll let the manuscript sit for a week or two, and then I'll pull it out and go at it with hacksaws, and hopefully it will resolve into a story worth showing around. I already have numerous plot and character points that need some definite scrubbing, and now I'm trying to figure out how to keep my writing going in the meantime. Maybe I'll try and work on some short stories I've let languish these last few months.



I see that smile.

I was a boy once...

I know. Hard to believe, right? I suppose some people might still call me that. Anyways, this meant that at some point in my formative years, I was exposed and dragged into this fascination (some might say fanatical cult) of science fiction and fantasy lovers. How did this happen?

The earliest books I can remember were the two classics: C.S. Lewis and Tolkien. But not Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia at first, but rather his lesser-known, but still amazing Space Trilogy, which I never actually read all the way through until my freshman year of college. I found the first two books, Out of the Silent Planet and Perelandra, enthralling, yet the third one (That Hideous Strength) started out way too boring, and I often skipped to the last half but couldn't understand a bit of it because of how much plot I ignored.

During these times of getting lost in The Hobbit and other such fables, including some series I haven't seen in a while, such as The Seven Sleepers, I never realized that my reading choices might have been looked down on by others, or seen as "geeky." I mean, sure, I was one of the class geeks (and I say that with some pride now) but these were some great stories! Why wasn't anyone else getting into them? Magic swords, cursed treasure and all the other convolutions of physics and the imagination. The more I read, the more I stuck my head deeper into the genre, remaining oblivious to what anyone else thought of it. In fact, I never really figured out this whole distinction some people make between higher literary quality and the speculative fiction genre. Sure, we never read any of my book choices in English class. We did Chaucer and Yeats and the closest we got to speculative fiction were the safe classics teachers allowed, like Dracula (if we were lucky) or Frankenstein, or random short stories come across in those bulky anthologies we had to get each year.

I've been coming across a lot of articles and essays lately where people either attack or defend speculative fiction for its supposed appeal only to the lesser-literary minded...junk food for the imagination, some people call it. Of no particular value to the American letters. My boiled down opinion is that it's a sad day when the wild imagination doesn't have a place in literature.

I discovered this article as well:

What if the Thirteen-Year-Olds are Right?

My reaction? "What if?" In touching on "escapist literature," as it is sometimes called, I particularly enjoyed coming across this bit towards the end of the article--

Reading tales of the fantastic transforms us back into dreaming children who love without reservation and can resist the grinding banality of the bureaucratized world where all that seems to matter is paying taxes and scraping together enough money to pay taxes again next year. To change our minds into the mode of the child does not mean that we lose our adult intelligence, but that we regain our free minds.

This is one of the reasons I love writing speculative fiction as much as I do reading it. It gives me an excuse to let my mind wander wherever and whenever I want and even use a semi-professional excuse to rationalize it. I'm growing up, but bringing my childhood with me. Sadly, others may refuse to consider the genre legitimate (though I claim that proving "legitimacy" or "literary worth" isn't the point of any genre but ones that people tack the word "literary" in front of), but they do so at their loss.

It isn't so much that adults aren't allowed to write or read about hippogriffs, succubi, and their kind...it's that most of them can't write or read about them. Their unhealthy minds cannot handle such concepts anymore. In the process of growing up in this era of rapid information exchange, ad creep, spam, and (alas) reality television, making the escape from their own minds into the worlds beyond has turned close to impossible.

That would be an awful thing, wouldn't it? Being locked inside our own heads forever, unable to get beyond the images on our television screens or newspapers? Do yourself a favor and get in touch with your inner thirteen-year-old, except for the whole pimples and squeaky voice deal.


I see that smile.

In case you were confused...

When you enter a bookstore, you are presented with enough options to make a Rubik's cube look simple. What aisles dare you to browse down? Self-help? Romance? The pastel-colored children's section? All the way into that far back corner of the lower level where science fiction and fantasy tend to end up? Genres are a tricky business, and there are entire marketing and sales teams in any publishing company that are devoted to figuring out the best section for a book to be labelled and stacked in, so that it reaches the right audience, and even then, many bookstores decide for themselves where the books actually end up.

So how can you tell genres apart? With the threat of oversimplification squarely in mind, here is a guide (provided by Jay Lake) to genres that explains the very core of what distinguishes one from the other.

Genre----Distinguishing Characteristics

General fiction----Nothing to explain

Literary fiction----If I have to explain, you wouldn't understand it anyway

Mystery----Explain what happened

Thriller/Technothriller----Explain how it happened

Romance----Explain who it happened to

Western----Explain what lily-livered varmint gone and done it

Horror----Explain what's about to happen

Science Fiction----Explain everything in technical detail

Fantasy----Explain everything in nonsensical detail

Magical Realism----Explain nothing

Surrealism----Go fishing for ice cream

Do you have other ways to determine where a story really belongs? For instance, where do all those paranormal romances go? Speculative fiction or romance? And of course, some memoirs these days may not belong in the nonfiction sections at all, depending on how creative the authors get.


I see that smile.

Hope

I don't normally use this blog as a pulpit, though I'm certainly not adverse to anyone's questions about religion and/or faith, should they pop up. But I did come across this passage in the Bible recently and thought it oddly applicable to my present situation in writing. I thought I'd share it, in case anyone was interested. I guess it being Sunday makes it more appropriate as well.

It has to do with hope.

Romans 5:3,4 "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."

Obviously there's a little bit of context surrounding this verse which people can take into account, but even singled out as it is, it's an encouraging verse, especially for a writer, or any sort of artist, really.

Pursuing writing as a career, I submit, requires a lot of hope. Hope that you can develop your craft to a publishable level. Hope that an agent will someday take notice of you and sell your book around to various publishing houses. In the mean time, as you are pursuing this, you do experience some suffering. Solitary confinement while you finish your draft. Lots of rejections.

Some people will tell you it's silly. That you'll never get enough return on your investment to make your craft worth it. That your chances are slim. That hope isn't worth clinging to. In our days, we want assurances, concrete promises signed on the line...and nothing but that will satisfy us. What value can simply sitting around, writing and hoping provide? Well, there's your answer.

Perseverance. Character. And more hope.

While that hope is coming to fruition, there are lots of other things happening as well. You're developing a thick skin. You're finding your voice as a writer and discovering a style that gels for you on the page. You're stretching new ideas and breaking away from genre cliches. You're learning to be patient with how slow the publishing industry can run sometimes. All these things will serve you in the future when that book contract becomes a reality, and instead of rejections, maybe you're dealing with negative reviews, slow sales numbers or writing under a real, crunch-the-clock deadline. That perseverance and character will still be there.

And so you continue to hope. Love may be one of the greatest things we can do and experience, but I also believe that hope can be just as valuable in our lives because it keeps us going and dreaming, even when times get difficult.

I see that smile.

All that and a bag of chips

Fall is finally here in NYC. By that, I mean the temperature has dropped below 80 degrees and we don't start sweating the moment we lift our heads off the pillow. There's a nice brisk to the air that means we have to be fashionable with sweaters and turtlenecks (which the wife has helped pick out for me). I will always enjoy the Fall and Winter seasons the most. I claim that they have the most comfortable clothing options, as well as the best comfort foods. Watermelon and lemonade in the summer is cool, but nothing beats roasted pumpkin, ginger cookies, hot cider, hot chocolate, and whatever else you require to warm up on a blustery evening.

I'm off and running to my martial class, so before I go, check out this link for some deep thoughts about the nature of God:

http://www.sinfest.net/archive_page.php?comicID=2593

Actually, a bag of chips sounds good right now. What's your favorite flavor? I'm usually bent on the sea salt and vinegar ones myself.

I see that smile.

Should we be worried?

We have free coffee and soda dispensers at work, in this tiny kitchen area down the hall. I don't actually drink coffee or tea. Never bought into the Starbucks habit, and I hope I never do. In fact, give me a mocha latte and I'll have an enormous headache after drinking it. However, I do drink a lot of diet soda. Often Pepsi or Coke works as my caffeine kicker. I know, healthy, huh? I've been trying to cut back, though. Making myself drink water, milk, juice, whatever I can substitute.

Especially since I saw this picture the other day:



http://pics.obra.se/0616_pepsi.jpg

It helps put things into perspective to know that I know my stomach lining is slowly being eaten away for the sake of waking up each morning.

So what's your wake-up vice? I've never been a morning person, and sometimes I resort to splashing freezing cold water in my face right as I stumble into the bathroom. Other times, I just suffer through that warmed-over zombie phase until my brain turns on around...oh...usually noon at the earliest. Anyone have some early morning remedies? And don't tell me "get to bed earlier" because that's asking way too much. (That and I do a lot of my more focused writing in the wee hours.)


I see that smile.

Where are you at?

This is a post of curiosity, sending out questions to anyone who drops by and reads this blog. I'm always grateful for your comments, insights and encouragement, but I'm interested in knowing where everyone else is on their writing adventures. What roads have you followed?

Are you published? Novels? Short stories? Unpublished and working hard to break in? Or maybe your writing is personal, something to push your creative side, but you don't intend for it to be something to share in the long run. What is it that you write? Poetry? Nonfiction? Historical romances? Do you have one amazing idea that will change the world, or maybe you're throwing yourself in for the long haul, with the dream of a career and bestsellerdom ahead in the distance.

Are you working with an agent or editor on your material, or are you fighting through queries and rejections as well? I'm simply curious, because as I see a lot of names and faces pop up, it's fun to get a sense of where we all are, traveling together with some of the same dreams and goals, but often at very different places in our individual writing pursuits.

Feel free to share whatever you'd like. I'm all ears.


I see that smile.

Do-it-yourself Tazer

A must-have for any writer going to a conference in the near future. Be sure to keep this handy abduct...er...self-defense tool nearby when agents and editors fling themselves at you to rip your sure-to-be-bestselling manuscript from your hands. Make sure they keep their distance with a few zaps until they've agreed to your every demand, including the 7-figure advance, national publicity campaign, and 25-city tour. Then you can let them out of the janitor's clos...I mean, sign your book contract with a feeling of safety and security that only a Tazer can bring.



Homemade Stun Gun Under $10 - video powered by Metacafe


Warning: This blog offers no insurance against lawsuits and/or being blacklisted from the publishing industry entirely should you attempt any or all of the suggestions it offers.


I see that (evil) smile.

The Author-Agent relationship

Alma Alexander (author of Worldweavers, first in a trilogy) gives her clear opinion on how to approach the author-agent relationship, which I found refreshing. Sometimes I think I lose a little focus in my continuing search for an agent. I get too caught up in tweaking one or two words in a query that, in reality, aren't going to make a big difference. Query letters are important, yes, but it's the writing and the story that is going to finally nab someone's attention.

Anyways, here are her thoughts on how to balance the between the extreme perspectives of, as she puts it:

“The agent works for YOU - what they do benefits you, and they get paid out of your slice of the pie, technically they are your employee."

vs.

“The agent is GOD, you are so lucky to have one, don’t do anything to get them mad at you, worship them, bribe them, sweet-talk them, do whatever it takes to keep them.”

The (Mutual) Care and Feeding of Authors and Agents

She reminds us that an agent and author are in a business partnership, and should work to benefit one another instead of everything going just one way. Authors shouldn't expect the agents to be acting as a personal valet, nor should an author sit sniveling in the corner, thrashing themselves and calling out "I'm unworthy!"

Agents are vital in the publishing industry, though it is entirely possible to forge a writing career without one...just incredibly more difficult. They dig through all the complicated contract jargon, they can often help the author get a higher advance, and they can be an invaluable source of advice and a reasonable voice as a story and career is developed.

I would rather keep looking for another six months and find a good, strong agent that works well with me and I can work well with in return, rather than land an agent tomorrow who goes about the job half-hearted and doesn't really believe in the stories I am trying to tell.



I see that smile.

Never give up

I sometimes wonder where I am in my writing...er...I need an image here to relate this...let's pick the "swimming pool." So...the writing swimming pool. Am I still in the shallow end with floaters on, bobbing about with little clue as to what I'm doing or how I can make the stories better? Have I managed to wade closer to the deep end, and can manage to hold myself afloat while splashing around and trying to find my voice? Or am I standing on the edge of the high-dive, about ready to plunge into the writing career of my dreams? (Please?)

Wherever I see myself (and sometimes it changes daily) it is at least nice to know that other authors have experienced these same phases. They've struggled through constant rejection, setback and more, but because of their persistence in trying to swim, they've begun to make breakthroughs. They didn't back off, and so they were there when opportunity presented itself.

Kelly McCullough (author of Cybermancy and WebMage) gives his experience and thoughts on some of the depression he battled during a trying time in his fledgling writing career, where he thought 15 years of writing efforts had proven fruitless.

http://www.sfnovelists.com/2007/09/25/cybermancy-launch-day-never-give-up/

It would be hard to get to a point where I might consider giving up writing for good. It would take a lot to get me there, but something bolsters your spirit when you can look at other people and see that they've survived such crash-n-burn scenarios and pulled through intact, if not stronger for it. An encouraging read.

I apologize if the thoughts are a little rambling today. Still waging war for the dominion of my sinuses. Is it a bad thing that Kleenex look a lot like little white flags of surrender?


I see that smile.

Silly science gets its reward

Did you ever wonder about the mathematics behind wrinkled sheets? Or whether sword-swallowing was bad for your health? These and other questions have been carefully researched by various scientific teams around the world, and now their results are being highlighted by the Ig Noble awards, which celebrate the more frivolous sides of science.

Among the various award-winners are the following studies:

• "Sword swallowing and its side effects" was published in a British medical journal last year.


• An inventor designed a bowl of soup that gradually refilled itself, creating a virtual "bottomless bowl."


• A Harvard professor discovered that the patterns in wrinkled sheets also are found in nature, coinciding with human and animal skin.


• And lastly...an award went to the U.S. Air Force, which developed a proposal for a chemical bomb that would make enemy soldiers so aroused they wouldn't want to fight anymore. Unfortunately, no military representative stepped forward to receive the award.

Nice to know that scientists are at least being imaginative in their pursuits, eh? What would you spend your time and money on if you were able to research any wacky sort of theory? I'd be interested in seeing if any of the old wives' tales and other superstitious cures that people float about had any legitimacy to them at their origin.


I see that smile.

A video test- Pixar's "Lifted"

This post is mostly to test the new video functions added to the blog, but I figured I should make it fun anyways.

For those of you who have seen the Pixar movie, Ratatouille, you may remember this animated short that was shown before the film itself. I didn't catch it in the theatre, but heard it was hilarious, and so managed to track it down. Watching this left me laughing hysterically, and the wife kept coming into the room to see what was sending me into fits, and then leaving again, shaking her head.

Enjoy



EDIT: Apparently, this movie has been removed due to a copyright claim by Pixar. Sorry, folks. You'll just have to imagine how hilariously funny it was on your own. If it becomes available again, I'll re-post it.



I see that smile.

The weather, being under it, and pink awards

I'm sure it's a common occurrence across the country; the season starts to change, the air gets a little chilly, and people in the house and/or office start a'snifflin', sneezin', and sounding like airplane engines backfiring when they cough. Why is it that seasonal weather shifts always wreak such havoc with our eyes, noses and throats? I'm thankful there isn't much I'm allergic to, but I'm hardly immune to the general throat phlegm, so I'm doing my best to be quiet for the next few days and give my raspy vocal cords a rest. Thank goodness fingers don't get colds or flu bugs.

And in a move that has made me smile, despite the lingering grey clouds of illness, La Chanson de Phoenix presented me with a blogging award:







It's big. It's pink. It's fabulous. Thanks, Phoenix.

I hope everyone else is sailing through the sniffles season, fingers and imaginations intact. So long as some brain-eating amoeba doesn't start floating around, I think we're okay. (Have I spoken too soon?)


I see that smile.

The nightmare machine

One of the joys of being a writer is taking your characters and throwing them into a worst-case scenario that they can't possibly get out of, and then watch them squirm as you bring it to a boil. Of course, one of the hardest things about being a writer is that you have to devise an ingenious way for your characters (or at least some of them) to survive so the story can actually continue to the end. A lot of characters end up facing their worst nightmares along the way, transforming them from pig-farm boys into prophesied heroes, or some other maturation of morals and skills.

What if you had to face your worst nightmare? And what if, as you fought it down, it only got worse?

http://www.newscientist.com/blog/technology/2007/09/nightmare-machine.html

Virtual Reality machines are used for a lot of therapy these days, helping people confront traumatic memories and such. But a new system has been developed that monitors the VR user's physical state, including level of sweat, heart rate, breathing, etc. to know when they are relaxed or at their most frightened. How could this be used (aside from non-sanctioned torture?)? The article gives examples like teaching people to work well under stress and such. It also mentions games. I've posted a few blogs on how computer games can sometimes have great stories to them, as well as other tech posts on how games are currently being linked to brain activity. So what if a game evolved as you played it based on your body's feedback, so it could tell the best moments to frighten you? Scary thought. Though I guess that's the whole point.

As writers, how could we use something like this? Hah. As if we could afford it, first off. But let's imagine...we could live out a scenario for a character and experience something of the same emotions they might. It'd be the ultimate in immersive research. Oh, and you know that as soon as eBooks become mainstream, VR books will become the next big publishing trend. I'll bet a dime on it.


I see that smile.

'Sci-fi' model worlds aid planet classification

One of the things I enjoy most while setting up a new story is the world building. It can be a long process, and sometimes it's more a series of discoveries that I make as I'm writing the story itself, rather than something I outline and follow from the beginning. I've been from one extreme to the next...entirely making it up as I go along, to building a world and knowing the details down to the temperate zones and weather patterns (alongside the systems of magic). Even making up maps for continents and such can suck me in for hours on end.

Aside from creating some place for my imagination to romp around, is there a use for conjuring up imaginary planets?

Science says there is.

http://space.newscientist.com/article/dn12685-scifi-model-worlds-aid-planet-classification.html

Basically, scientists were discovering worlds that were so far outside what they were expecting that they just decided to start making up classifications that hadn't been discovered yet, but could (within the laws of physics as we know them) potentially exist. This way, when we do actually discover (visit/explore/conquer/ravage) these planets sometime in the future, we'll already have a system worked out on how to label and categorize them.

Now that's thinking ahead. Some examples? How about planets made of mostly carbon monoxide, helium, or carbon? How about pure water and ice planets? It all sounds like something you see on the viewscreen of the Starship Enterprise, I know. But in our big universe, a lot of things seem possible.

Question for the day: Imagine a weird planet, something totally unlike what people would consider a "normal" heavenly body, and figure out what kind of stories might happen on it. For instance, I remember seeing a novel set on a planet that wasn't round, but something like a polyhedron, with icy mountains along each straight border that walled kingdoms and cultures off from each other. I can't remember the name of this novel (if you recognize it, I'd love to know), but I do remember being captivated by the idea and thinking how unique it sounded. Maybe that's another way to make your story stick out--don't just make up a new system of magic, stick your entire world way out there on the spectrum of scientific possibility.

I see that smile.

A lecture on achieving your dreams

It's long, but it's worth watching.

http://cmu.edu/uls/journeys/

Professor Randy Pausch was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and given six months to live. He gave his last lecture Sept. 18, 2007 on "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams." He talks about how he pursued the little dreams he set for himself as much as the big ones, no matter how random or silly they might have appeared. Things from floating in zero-g to winning the huge teddy bears at carnival booths to becoming an "imagineer" for Disney, and more.

I love this guy's attitude, in the face of such terrible news. He forbids people from acting sad for him and shows off how in-shape he is for the time being. This is someone who has used the time he's been given well, and even in a life that may be cut shorter than any of us would like, were we given a choice.

Take the time to watch this and see if it doesn't inspire you to chase after your dreams with just a little more determination, no matter how silly they may seem.

I see that smile.

What's in a name?

Who doesn't want to be immortalized? Who doesn't want their name remembered long after they've ceased to be? That's a seductive dream for anyone, writers included. But what if your name became synonymous with a dastardly deed, or some otherwise undesirable term?

There are a lot of words in our vocabulary that derive straight from a person's name, forever memorializing a less-than-honorable act or way of living. Here's a list of such words and their inspirations:

Awful words named for real people

My favorites? I've got a preference for "spoonerism" only because I catch myself doing it all the time. I looked the term up a while back, thinking there had to be a scientific term for mixing up my words, and bo and lehold, here it is.

"Draconian" is also a fun one, since it comes from a guy (an Athenian law-maker named Draco, who may or may not have existed) who applied the death penalty to such menial crimes as being lazy, or taking a piss in an alley. I think reinstating capital punishment for laziness would be a nice spur in the economy's rear, wouldn't it?

Any others you think should be added to the list?


I see that smile.